Rick Santorum To Bring Word Of God And/Or Rick Santorum To Heathen CNN

All out of frothy jokes. … [Read more...]

Get Well Soon, Poppy and Bar Bush

Look this good when 92 you are, you will not. … [Read more...]

2016 Was Third Straight Hottest Year Ever, But It’s Probably Snowing Somewhere, So No Big

Damn, those Chinese sure have been busy faking climate data. … [Read more...]

Trump Jerk Roger Stone Was Poisoned To Death By The CIA, But He Got Better

Could it have been ... SATAN? … [Read more...]

HHS Nominee Tom Price Will Fit Great In Trump Cabinet, Because Of How He Is Grafty

Well sure he's getting rich from being in office. Why else would anyone take such a crappy job? … [Read more...]

Who’s Made Over 20,000 Donations To Planned Parenthood Since The Election? ‘Mike Pence,’ That’s Who!

Trolls for Social Justice! … [Read more...]

Harry Reid, Democrats Ask Donald Trump To Deport Steve Bannon Back To 1938

People seem not to like this Steve Bannon. Maybe it's the haircut. Or the fascism. … [Read more...]

Breitbart Watch: If You Exclude Every Vote For Clinton, Trump Won With 100% Of The Popular Vote!

Also if you exclude 49 states, all of America is Oklahoma. … [Read more...]

Bundy Bunch Trial Starts With Life-Or-Death Demand To Allow Idiots To Wear Cowboy Boots

Strictly a bring-your-own-dildo affair. The Bundy brothers have each other. … [Read more...]

Italian Supreme Court Rules Public Masturbation Not A Crime, Police Must Take Hands-Off Approach

On second thought, leave the cannoli. … [Read more...]

RNC Night Three: Let’s Watch America Be First And Mike Pence Be Number Two! A Livebloog!

It's 'Make America First' Night at the RNC. Let's see what that nice Mr. Lindbergh has to say, shall we? … [Read more...]

Mike Pence To Handle A Bit More Than Typical Veep, Like ‘Domestic Policy And Foreign Policy’

It's a good thing Mike Pence isn't a power-hungry jerk. At least we hope he isn't because if Donald Trump wins in November, Pence will run things while Trump golfs. … [Read more...]

Smart Donald Trump Picks Perfect Moment To Seek Legal Vengeance For Staffers’ Sex Affair Story

With days to go before the GOP convention, Donald Trump picked the perfect time to sue a former staffer to shut him up about a sex affair between senior staffers. Wait, a SEX AFFAIR BETWEEN SENIOR STAFFERS? … [Read more...]

New Guy On N.C. Board Of Education Will Save Kids From Sex Books, Like Isabel Allende’s

North Carolina's state Board of Education has a brand new member -- a rightwing Christian who thinks a modern classic by Isabel Allende is nothing more than a "sex book." … [Read more...]

Paul Ryan Says Hillary Clinton Too Dangerous For CIA Briefings, Trump Just Fine

Paul Ryan would prefer that Hillary Clinton not know America's secrets. Or at least not any that she didn't already know after four years as Secretary of State. … [Read more...]

Donald Trump Hearts Saddam Hussein

Donald Trump thinks Saddam Hussein was an admirable role model for dealing with terrorists, because he got the job done. Why would anyone have a problem with a simple factual statement like that? … [Read more...]

Elizabeth Warren Hell-Raising On Senate Floor: ‘Who Do You Work For?’ (Citigroup, Duh)

Elizabeth Warren did a bit of outreach to Republicans today, urging them to remove from the omnibus budget bill that rollback of part of the Dodd-Frank financial reform law that we covered earlier today. If you really oppose government bailouts, she said, then why on earth would you vote for this measure that would allow FDIC insurance to bail out banks that lose money on derivatives trades … [Read more...]

Bill Nye Weeps For Your Stupid Homeschooled Children

We sure like us some Bill Nye. Following up on his February “debate” at the Creation museum, in which he handily took apart the bad science behind that institution, Nye has a book out, Undeniable: Evolution and the Science of Creation. Which is why he braved the dungeon of derp that is Newsmax TV to explain why creationism is simply not good for kids. What it mostly comes down to, of … [Read more...]